Rape Culture

Rape Culture in the USA


I am literally sick and disgusted at #RapistBrockTurner, his father and Judge Aaron Persky that I have to blog about this and share a story.

As a professional woman I have dealt with my share of sexual harassment.  I started my professional career as a CPA doing tax work in January 1986.  In the 1980’s no one cared that sexual harassment happened in the work place.  Not even the HR department! Shocking, I know.  It’s true.  If you were sexually harassed at work you just had to keep working with the person.

I worked 5 1/2 years in public accounting and then 6 years in a corporate tax department of a large company.  Sexual harassment happened to me and other woman I worked with but no one cared.  The men never got in trouble, never got fired, nothing ever happened. So why would a woman even mention that she was sexually harassed at all?  We stop mentioning it because of people like #RapistBrockTurner, his father and Judge Persky.  They don’t think there is anything wrong with it.  They blame it on alcohol, drugs and promiscuity.  They are more concerned about the rapist than the victim.  Wake up Dan Turner! Your son is a convicted rapist!

I’m going to share a horrible story that still makes me sick to this day and I was the lucky one.  I was not drunk and I was able to fight off my attacker!  My roommate wasn’t so lucky.

It was 1991.  I had a job I liked and had just bought my first home. To help with the payments I decided to get a roommate.  I will call my roommate Samantha for purposes of this post.  Samantha and I decided it would be fun to have a summer BBQ/pool party.  I owned a townhouse and our community had a pool so we both invited friends and co-workers over one afternoon on a weekend.  The afternoon was fun and people started leaving so by evening time there was only a small group left.   At some point I went into my bedroom for something and was attacked by one of my co-workers who I will call Brian.  Brian pushed me down on my bed and because I wasn’t drunk and he was really drunk I was able to fight him off and get myself out of the situation.  The music was loud so no one else heard this happening.  I was extremely pissed and went back downstairs and wanted Brian to leave.

At that point one friend (I will call Steve) was passed out on the couch which was fine because he was too drunk to drive home. Brian’s ride, Jeremy was ready to leave and I thought Brian was in the bathroom but when we went down the hall we heard Brian in Samantha’s room.  We both were confused but thought maybe Brian and Samantha liked each other.  So Jeremy left.  At that time, we had no idea that Samantha apparently was so drunk she took off her bathing suit and passed out naked in her bedroom while the rest of us were still hanging out and talking.

To this day, I regret not knocking on her door.  But I know this was not my fault or Samantha’s.  I had no idea what was happening to her.  I couldn’t even imagine that someone I knew and worked with would be committing a horrific violent act in my home.   But it happened.  A rape occurred in my home by someone I knew.

The next morning Samantha told me what happened. I was shocked, pissed, angry and Brian was still in my house. Thankfully Steve had slept on my couch and was still there.  I told Steve that he can’t leave my house without taking Brian so he did and they left.

Samantha and I contacted the police and she went to the hospital. The story continues like so many other rape victims.  His word against hers.  I remember the prosecutor coming to my house to record a phone conversation between Samantha and Brian on speaker phone. They were trying to get him to admit what he did.  He didn’t. I remember being at work that following Monday when they said they were going to arrest him.  It ended up the police didn’t have enough evidence to arrest him so nothing happened to him.

I had to face him every day at work.  He continued to harass me at work by constantly asking me out even though he was dating someone in our department.  He would constantly tell me that I was the one he wanted not the person that he was currently sleeping with in the office.  Luckily, his part of the department was moving out of state but not for 6 months.  I liked my job but wanted to quit because of him.  I couldn’t afford to quit because I had to pay my mortgage.   I was so angry that one day I started screaming at him when he stepped into my office.

Then one day my boss walked in my office and said he had great news.  They decided that we needed more help in my area and were going to have Brian stay on.  I could only respond by saying “I will quit if he Brian stays”.  I never had to quit because they didn’t keep Brian.

I wasn’t the one raped so I can only imagine how horrible it is to be a rape victim.  I’m sure Brian has raped other woman without any consequences.  It’s disgusting and there was nothing we could do.

The strong woman who survived being raped by #RapistBrockTurner has to live with that the rest of her life.  Rapists have one goal and #RapistBrockTurner was no different.  He wanted his “20 minutes of action” as his father put it.  His father is part of the problem.  He didn’t teach his son that rape is wrong. He didn’t teach him you don’t rape.   He is a white male.  If he was non-white his sentence would have been different and we all know that.

I get it.  He loves his son and doesn’t want to see him in prison but he is a convicted felon. He was caught in the act and convicted by a jury.  Convicted of 3 felonies!!!  His mother wrote a letter to the judge as well and stated this “My first thought upon wakening every morning is “this isn’t real, this can’t be real. Why him? Why HIM? WHY? WHY?”  

REALLY?  WHY DID YOUR SON DO THIS? HE IS A CONVICTED FELON AND SHOULD BE PUNISHED ACCORDINGLY!  

He should be sentenced to prison.  His mother begged for no jail or prison time.  She said her family “will never be happy again.”  

WTH?  DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT WHAT YOUR SON DID TO THE YOUNG WOMEN?

No, I don’t think you care.  Your son is not a “trust-worthy and honest person” like you think.  Getting drunk or taking drugs doesn’t make you a rapist.  Raping someone makes you a rapist.  Your son is not “considerate, and respectful” like you say. There are consequences to committing violent crimes and the punishment in this case didn’t fit the crime. The Turner family would feel completely different if some young guy did this to their daughter.  

I’m so sorry this happened to this women and that this has happened to so many other women.  I wish the best for this woman.  She stood up and faced him and read her letter.  I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been.  I have already read her letter twice.  I won’t forget it.  I hope her letter helps other rape victims.  I wish justice was properly served.

-A big thanks to the two Swedish men that helped her –

Here are links to the heroes in this case and the letter the victim read in court  

The Heros of the Case

The Victim’s Letter She Read in Court


More good links

What does Rape Culture Mean?

I’m a Dad of 3 Boys. I Married a Rape Victim—& I Have Something to Say to Brock Turner’s Father

The Conversation You Must Have With Your Sons

A Sexual Assault Survivor Responds To The Stanford Rape Case


Here are other links to the #RapistBrockTurner Case

#RapistBrockTurner Letter

www.rapistbrockturner.com

Summary of the Case

Guilty Verdict

#RapistBrockTurner Lied

Did He Send Out Pics of Victim’s Breasts?

Rapist Blames Party Culture on Campus

Dan Turner Plea to Judge for Leniency for His Son

Carleen Turner Letter to Judge

Fallout by Brock Turner’s Friend 

Vice President Joe Biden’s Thoughts

Philip DeFranco Stanford Rapist Brock Turner Video

Philip DeFranco Update

Ban from USA Swimming

Racism in Sentencing 

Recall Judge Persky

#RapistBrockTurner Legal Defense

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “Rape Culture in the USA”

  1. Hi Kim Hopefully things will change for women as this case plays out. So Sorry to hear about your experience. 😦 There are many women I know who have stories to tell. So sad.

    Love linda

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Liked by 1 person

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